Variations on a Home Depot Paint Sample

To mix Desert Sunrise 230B-4, combine equal parts vodka, orange juice, pineapple juice, and troposphere; add grenadine syrup to taste. Throw in blender with ice cubes and a handful of red dirt. Blend. Next drive westward all night along I-80 until you reach Wyoming, and, when you see in your rearview the faintest tincture of light bleeding into reddish bluffs, pull into the nearest rest stop. Wash your face in the frigid tap water, and next note the uncanniness of your reflection in the warped wrought-iron mirror.

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